Two weeks ago, we sat under the shade in the garden. We were four. Now we are but three.
Anticipating the pain and difficulties to come, I opened myself to the enjoyment of the moment on that late summer afternoon, knowing that each moment once lived is lost forever, but not knowing that there would be no others like it, not knowing that the pain and difficulties would not be those we had imagined, not knowing that they would come so swiftly and definitively.
I am deeply affected. I cling to that moment, special in so many ways, as I cling to the memories of all those whom I have held dear but who are no longer part of this world. My heart cries out for the injustice, the anguish of consciousness, but there is nowhere to register my complaints.
I am here. I am ok, but I may need some time to find my energy again.